ZOMG ! now I'm feeling festive..

Haven't blogged for a while, causeee my feelings have been all over the shop and I DO'NAE LIKE MOANING. Anywayyy, yeah. Saturday and Sunday were amazsing, Monday was not so great.. only free I usually get last and I had to stay behind for a daft meeting, Tuesday was.. can't remember. Wednesday gave me a breakdown about Helen, yesterday was dull and today was actually pretty sound :D
Usually friday's suck a tad cause I don't get any frees and most people go at lunch. BUTT today, Stefaniak babe was kinda ill, she's just about blinded herself and drugs herself up on eyedrips that make her pupils dilate to WHOOOAAAA big ;D so yeah. She went halfway through lesson 3 giving us last lesson free 'cause she wouldn't be able to come back, so I got to escapeeee at lunchhh :D:D:D AND Lorna May daring Bumcrack's sister gave me a lift home (:

I do (L) my friends.. (':

AND I'm feeling kinda festive (: cause Joshuaaaaaaaa was talking about who he had to get presents for and whatnot last night, and when I was in Barcelona I found this utterly adorable necklace in tokidoki but did'nae have the money and junk :/ THEN I went searching on the internetttt last night, and look what I found (':

and yeah, I'm rather in love with it :D and it's only liiiike, $8.00 + $3.00 shipping, and no, I'm far too lazy to figure out how much it is in squids. But still, inexpensive necklace which is uber cute (L)

And this thing just made me giggle quite alot..

 
It's called poo ^.^ POO as in poo, as in the stuff that you get rid of out your backside. POOO damn it. IT'S A NECKLACE WITH POOP ON IT !! Yeah, I like it in a kinda weird way..

Anyway, need to find something for Daisy, I was considering something like that for her ? Or momijii or manga.. Ah, so tired. 

In other news, I'm being weirdly nice, spoke to my dad for the first time in like 4 years the other day, it's kinda weird. I'm mature god damn it (: and I've stolen my brother's acoustic guitar he doesn't need anymore cause his ex bought him an electric guitar... But yeah, hoping I might master it at some point?

Right, really need to do stupid work :/ back laterrr perhaps (: let me know if I'm getting irritating..

x

such a contrast

It's so strange.. This week, in fact the last couple of weeks have been utter poop really, due to the Helen fiasco and a mix of exams, fails, and the general mood of depression and being down. Then this weekend has made me completely incapable of being sad ! 

Friday I wasa kinda worried I was going to be the social parasite that does nothing, as it was Hinckley's christmas light explosion type thing. It attempts to be amazing and then fails spectacuarly when they forget people are trying to have a COUNTDOWN HERE, or they do it in time with the countdown, but then the lights aren't actually plugged in or something, or explode into a million pieces.. But yeah, they have a fair thing and charity stalls and what not in the main street, so I decided to drag my darling Archi out for a mosey. The lights were the same as usual, missed them being turned on because me and mum are appalling at time keeping, the fireworks were rather entrancing though seeing as we could see them from the car into Hinckley. Thenn, the fair was exactly the same as it is EVERY year, they don't change where they're put or anything, it's comical really. I bet they have the stage label things.. (': ah my wonderfully sad mind (L)
Kinda weird walking round Hinckley in the dark even though it was only like 7pm. Ended up throwing chips at eachother and vomiting over disgusting tasting coffee, no wonder it was only a quid.. but still, was rather fun. AND I KNEW PEOPLE !! I felt rather popular (': emotional and enpowering moment for me ;D

And yesterday was simply EPIC. It was amazing, even though everything was last minute and I was petrified that there'd be absolutely nothing today and Jacob would end up hating me 'cause I can be an irritating twit, it went wonderfully :D managed to make Hinckley fun even though I thought that was an impossibilty.. Never stopped smiling, even when he nicked my ipod and mocked me because I'm terribly vain. Bleh. T'was good :D chinese takeaway (L) and tescooooo (L) good times (': made my year :D

Having such a lazy day today as well, my hair dried fairly nicely last night so had a photography moment this morning, then have done nothing really productive. I guess I'm gonna have to do biology or history or something soon. January exams = A3 posters. GAH !! But still (': happy happy happy !!

 

ANDDDDDD my fake 6 euro zippo lighter's working again :D:D:D makes me VERY happyyy, and I've got some lip stuff to sort out my lips, carmex or something ? It tiiingles, not too sure if it's supposed to but who caress, it does the job (':


Laters lovelysssssss (:
x

)':

Never cried so much in my life. Sweet dreams Helen babe, so many people turned up it was unreal (:

Really horrible that you've gone )': miss you so much. x

hello world..

I say world, but I am in a discrete part of the world on actually a very titchy island that's brimming with culture, people and chavs. Gah. Perhaps ? Not too sure about the culture side of things, the government have banned Christmas junk being put in Birmingham or something because apparently it offends the ethnic minorities. Jog the eff on. They don't care ! They realise that we have our culture yet manage to cater for theirs as well. All in all we get on rather harmoniously until some prat of a chav decides to start something which is just to big themself up. Stupid people.

But mehh, I do try and keep associations with those people as far away as possible. I am after all a relatively intelligent 6th former who has chosen ridiculous subjects for AS and is looking forward to dropping one after AS. *sigh* today's finally arrived :/
And for those who are blissfully ignorant of why I've been dreading today, which will be the majority of you actually seeing as I never mentioned it.. Or maybe I did. Bleh. Buutttt basically it's Helen's funeral today. Mmm. Not good really. The crematoriam's going to be absolutely packed, hundreds of people are going, the population of lower 6th form's going to total about 25 predictably today, Ibstock where she lived, is going to be like a Ghost town, hardly any one at her college is gonna be there.. Jeeez it's weird. Horrible weird )':


I guess it's nice that loads of people are going to go to show they care alot, but it's still wrong that she's not here. So terribly young ):


I think I need more coffee actually, caffine and sugar are going to get me through today methinks, that and music that sooothes me even if it makes me cry. Today I'm allowed damn it !! Been a rough few weeks to be frank. In a way it's nice to have a bit of closure.. get to a conclusion kinda thing. I keep thinking that if Helen was still here and nothing had happened, how different it would be ? I mean it's not been massively different, but it's changed, perspective has changed, thoughts, ways of thinking and realisations.. 


End of the depressing feeling for now. I'm saving it for later.


I do love Daughtry right now.. 


Anyway, I have to make coffee and get going soon ): laters guys..
x

OHHHH yeah..

I've just remembered what I was gonna go and doooo (: but now I CBA to go back onto facebook and find who I wanted to go on cause they have a new photo.. I'm so ridiculously lazy.. that and I've just realised that I've been spelling ridiculous wrong all my life. But that's cause I think it looks daft to be frankkk (: Gah. I'm sure I'll live.
I'm knackereddd, really really knackered.. and I haven't written a proper post for a while, it's kinda weird writing it again actually. Today's actually been pretty good, the only bad thing about today was the stupid history test thing. Even that wasn't totally crap because the lovely looking 6th former decided to park his rather delicious bottom outside A4 in the study area. I knew I was going to fail the test anyway so I spent the majority of the lesson looking aimlessly out the doorrr (': yes I'm sad. But the foreign policy hardly interests me.. Bleh. 


Had a good few conversations with Joshuaaa, my darling lesbian. He's such a retard bless him... Lovely, yes. But a complete retard (': although he has apparently got a surprise thing for me which is rather sweet ^.^ 
Haaaaa, been talking to Sebastian as well lately, it's kinda funny really. More pathetically funny than anything else, I mean he's nice enough I suppose ? But it's just the fact he was going out with a girl for a month, who lived near him, yet didn't actually meet him until the day he dumped her. Seroiusly, WTF ?! With me.. I can understand. But LOCAL ?!?!? Gah, who knew (:
It's not too bad talking to him again ;)


COFFFEEEEEEE (L)


STARBUCKSSSSs.. got the day off tomorrow 'cause of PLP :D so happy.. means that I can have a half decent lie in, even though I'll still have to get up early cause mummy's left me to fend for myself when she's helping some friends, I don't mind, it's just effort getting up. So lazy ! 
Ah well, I do love my dogs (: time to consider sleeping a little.. NEED A NEW PHONE !! GRR. *sigh* christmas isn'nae going to bring my deepest desires. Bugger. Ah sweelllll..


Nightnight
x

what to say really..

Mmm, my last post was rather depressing and sad and all, can'nae really help that I'm afraaiiid, did take some flowers down to the crash site last sunday, made it all seem so real. Really horrible tbh, I mean nice to see how many people cared, but that much was obvious from her facebook and stuff. Argh. Not a good week at all. To be frank, this week wasn't much better either. Gah.

This week basically consisted of doing all the homework I was given in week 1 (ie. last week) and doing it this week, it's how my weeks go.. Week 1 I get lobbed homework, left right and centre, then in week 2 I spend each evening doing it. Can'nae wait until the Costa in Hinckley opens ! Means I can get a decent coffee in my frees ;D
Only good bits of this week were hanging out with Lorna, god I've missed that girl. We've known eachother since we were rediculously small (: 

But meh. Wendesday and Thursday were difficult 'cause of things with Helen and stuffs, but my favourite 6th former was in most the week so I got to look at something nice when I was finishing work for history or chem. Those are ironically pretty much the only two subjects that I get bombarded with work for ! in history, Stefaniak, it's expected, Addison it's half expected but it's not really taxing, then with Townsend it's simply a pain and homework ends up being what we SHOULD have done in the lesson, but because she's an appalling teacher and crap at organising the lessons, we never actually finish it in the lesson. *sigh*
AND we have a test on the foreign policy that Townsend's *supposed* to be teaching us on Monday, oh joy. ANOTHER sodding fail. Had a test on the Whigs on Friday. Oh God I've failed.

Friday was a bad day, I'll just leave it at that I think (:

Butt today was'nae too bad actually, needed to go into Leicester to get a dress for the 19th, Helen's funeral. Her mum wanted everyone to go in bright colours, but at this time of year, there isn't much in bright colours :/ so yeah. But I think the dress I got is rather nice, looks a bit like this one.. but the one I got isn't on the website :S

The one I got has white lace and hasn't got the pretty deer and tree thing going on, just has some flowes or some such. I just didn't want to get a dress that costs about 25 quid and I'd only wear once. I'm a student, I don't have a job and I'm far too poor to be able to do that !! While I was in New Look got some boots as well, the picture's rubbish cause I prefer them folded down.. I'd look like a twit if they were pulled up, too short for that ;D

 

To be fair they are kinda chavvy, well.. Chavs appear to wear them ? They give the impression that my feet might have a chance of being warm and snug on the way to school and back in winter, even if they have eff all grip ;D howeverrr, today was a successful day of shopping for me, which DOES make a change :D I needed boots and a dress, I got boots and a dress. For Archimuff it was different, she dragged me round Boots for over an HOUR trying to decide what to get people, and after all that she bought nothing. Could'a killed her. If it wasn't for the fact that I love her and she bought me a gingerbread latte from Starbucks ^.^

(L) that girl (':

Right, time to sign off I think (: nightnight all. Try and blog more often if I get a chance to have a break from history and chem (:

x 

 

to a lovely girl and an amazing friend

I haven't blogged in ages, I could say I had no inspiration and my internet went through a spell of constantly buggering itself up. However there is another reason. On wednesday, 4th November, one of my best friends Helen Wright was killed in a car crash. Me and the other 2 she was closest to at JC were the last to find out at break on Thursday the 5th. 
It was horrible to say the least. Everyone else in 6th form knew what had happened, and us 3 didn't. It was the r.i.p. messages on facebook that hurt the most.. spent most of Thursday crying and trying to comfort Hannah and Zoe with Lorna trying to help as well. Got let home at break, none of us were up to lessons. 

Went in on friday and spent most the day crying, skipped last lesson and spent the rest completely out of it. So yeah, pretty shitty couple of days to be frank.

This is Helen btw, she was sp beautiful, funny, constantly happy, we never saw her without a smile or having a laugh. She'd just got everything sorted, was going really well at college and had got a wonderful boyfriend who treated her amazingly like she deserved. She was loved by everyone, even people who didn't know her well know that she was a star and will be truly missed, never forgotten and always loved. So many happy memories through so many years, ever since year 2 really. 

As much as she changed her style, her hair and her boyfriends, she was the same caring, loyal, funny, happy go lucky girl as ever. Going to lay some lilies down for her tomorrow at the roadside with Hannah, Zoe and Natalie, don't really know how we're going to hold it together. Then there's the funeral. Sometimes I feel I should stop crying and just hold it in, but it's impossible. She'll be forever missed. 

Rest in peace Helen babe, 9th June 1993 - 4th November, 2009. You were taken before your time, I know you called me a nerd for writing blogs and an emotional twit, but it's the way we roll. Forever a place in all our hearts, goodnight sweet cheeks, god bless. 

                                      

 
she will never be forgotten and missed by everyone, 

http://www.thisisleicestershire.co.uk/news/Loving-tributes-girl-killed-Leicestershire-road-tragedy/article-1489839-detail/article.html

http://www.thisisleicestershire.co.uk/news/Family-devastated-lovely-girl-killed-car-crash/article-1492004-detail/article.html
her facebook is covered in comments and there are so many groups it's unbelievable. even people who hardly knew her are upset, that's how lovely she really was. 


sorry for the more solem nature of this, but hey. it's a tragedy and should never have happened. she should still be here with us.
x

oh bugger it.

I feel the solitary life of Bridget Jones creeping slowly over me. 

Well, perhaps after uni ? I'm really not of the opinion that life's already over at the tender age of 16. I don'nae think my life has been tainted enough for that yet, although it has been tainted a fair bit. Hmm ?
It's sort of weird to be writing to this again, I haven't posted anything for about a month ? I say a month, about 2 weeks. But to be fair, even that wasn't much good. I'm feeling the whole writers block type fandango lately. Plus last week I was utterly swamped with history homework with the odd bit of chemistry shoved in. Found out I might have to have a mentor for chem as well, made me feel horribly stupid even though I'm perfectly aware it might just help me with it. I did actually manage to pass the trawl test for chemistry by ONE mark ! Was it pathetic I was deliriously happy that I passed with an E by ONE mark ? Methinks so somehow. 
Then I had to have a moles test, well my whole class did, passed that with a C. Gave me some inclination that I'm not actually doing as badly as I fear :D Redid the chemistry trawl test, tad worried about getting that back actually.. Then in biology I've pretty much aced the coursework which makes me happy even though I still have to do the evaluation *facepalms.* But passed Bromerzzzzzz test with one mark off a B (: I know you lovely people probably don'nae give a flying fart in space, but it makes me happy to know I'm actually doing relatively well (:

Waiting for 2 essays back from history and one from english. Fun times ? Nah. I would rather chew my arm off. I'm tired with A levels and I'm not even halfway through them :| it's just such a leap from GCSE ! As though I didn't realise this when we started in September. Holy lord I'm a twit.

Anywayyy, yesterday was all Hallows EVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE (: and I did in fact get invited to a Halloween fandango type thing, which I found out about 5 hours before that it was fancy dress. Reg. Fancy dress. Halloween. Just no. Saw Archimuff yesterday morning though, Hinckley was a scary sight, especially as I haven't actually ventured into it for ages.. not properly anyway. 'Tis a worrying bunch of individuals. Made me happy to think there's only two years of slogging away at 6th form until I can run away to UCL or Aberystwyth.. Hopefully (:

Lassttt niiight I did actually make an effort to look as though I'd "dressed up" which involved buying a gorgeous, but pricey dress (25 squid) from New Look. I know that's hardly expensive but I was kinda saving up for a blackberry :/ then some devil horn things from Claire's and then the application of stupid amounts of eyeliner, most of which ended up in my eye or all over my face. The end result wasn't too bad, although the red lipstick was slightly scary.. Thennn, off did I toddle to Scott's with Daisy and discovered the Butch Futch and Stephen had graced us with their presence, although Stephen failed to dress up. Then again, I s'pose his face is scary enough ;)

Yesss, we're seriously that cool (: we're like a modern day version of the Sanderson sisters xD can you see the resmblence ?

Don't deny it, you know we're cool (: although change the order round a bit.. The Futch does like to sniff children and bark occassionally ;) Scott had the most immense make up to be fair, I'm not sure if it was an attempt on Marilyn Manson, but it looked frickin' amazing :D

Last night was pretty good to be frank, but today I'm being so unbelievably lazyyyy. ALTHOUGHHH I did get my zippo lighter working yesterday :D cause my brother came home from uni for the day and sorted it for meee (: only problem now, is that there's a likelyhood that I'm going to set the house on fire :/ bleh. I love my zippo (: and no. I don't smoke cause I'm not stuuupid. 

Right, I think I've rattled on for long enough, and frankly I've got nothing else to talk about. So yeah, y'know. Don'nae want school tomorrow :/ although I doo get a lie in :D love my free periods and home study (':

Latersssss m'homies 

x